when I grow up.

Some people know, from a very early age, what they want to do on this earth for the rest of their lives. I, on the other hand, seem to fall in love with a different occupation every year or two. This is not a bad thing. I have learned that it is my nature. Evolution is beautiful. A few things do remain constant within those changes, however.

a. I want to do something with my hands. create. build. dig in.

b. I want to help others. to change their lives for the better somehow. to solve their problems.

c. I feel passionate about it. sometimes too passionate!

d. I get so excited and overwhelmed and take on way to much way too fast and ...

e. I tend to fizzle out a little while after I start.

this really just pisses me off.

so, what's a girl to do? there is a new path I want to take, a lovely, grass covered path, lined with sage and trust. I can see the light bouncing off the plants now. I feel in my heart that this path will lead me into great fields of work and inspiration. I have been consistently studying this area for a few years and have even looked into several different career options that might come of it. I have continued to study, for person enjoyment and for my families needs, not giving much thought to the business side of it until recently. But, how do I keep from becoming overwhelmed, halting my learning and possibly ending what could be a great beginning to a beautiful area of my life?

I started out about 4 years ago wanting to go back to school to become a Naturopath. I believe that we are filling our bodies with so many unnatural things and are therefore making ourselves so sick. This can be prevented, even reversed. I wanted to teach others, to encourage them that there is another way, besides popping pills to mask the symptoms and ignoring the issues instead. Upon looking into this, I discovered that not only would I have to go to medical school (yikes!), then go to 4 years of naturopath school, but I would more than likely have to move across the country because there is no naturopath school near me. Apparently, Arizona has a great one. As does Oregon. By the time I finished with school, and never seeing my family or children in the process, I would be hitting 50 and not too keen on starting a practice at that point in my life. Plus, I'd be exhausted by then and probably just want to retire. Plan B.

Next, I looked into becoming a Nutritionist. I love eating healthy, but can certainly put away the junk food when the mood strikes. Lately, that bell has been ringing a lot. (thanks baby) It sounded ok, but it didn't speak to my heart the way becoming a Naturopath did. Quickly moving on to Plan C.

I started studying alternative medicines, treatments and herbs. I really enjoyed it and have continued to consult my books for several years now. I have incorporated many new herbs, vitamins and tinctures into our daily routine. I have moved into natural treatments for common colds, burns, etc. It goes hand in hand with living a whole food based lifestyle and can be done on any scale. I believe that what we eat, or don't eat, can heal us. Natural medicine is really speaking to me.

I read a book called Medicine Man by Robert J. Conley a few months ago and instantly rolled over in bed upon finishing it to tell my husband that I was going to become a Medicine Woman. He chuckled and told me he could just picture it. Me handing out jars of tinctures and poultices to my clients. I could see it too. I still can. It makes me smile and lightens my heart.

Recently, in an attempt to gather more knowledge of herbs and natural healing ways, I have stumbled across several websites, blogs, and books that teach people about herbs, their uses and how to put them into practice in your own life. The more I see of this the more I love the way it makes me feel inside.

I ran across Kiva Rose somewhere along the way. I watched a video that was promoting her new course Herb Energetics. I have watched the first installment and have another gorgeous e-mail just waiting for me to open it and learn about taste and the six flavors. It sounds glorious, right? This course is a building block for me. To delve a little deeper into my practice to see where I really am with the plants and how far I want to take this. Her knowledge of the earth and plants really has encouraged me to learn more. That I can do this at any level, for any reason.

I've also come across Aviva Romm. Right now, she is inspiring me to look forward down the road, at what I can become. I can't justify taking her course right now for many, many reasons. It's nice to have a goal though. I think her path will cross mine sooner rather than later.

I am trying to take this slow and learn at my own pace so that I don't get overwhelmed and discouraged. I feel like I have helped some people through natural medicine, myself included. Every day I feel strong and more connected to this...calling. This evolution of my soul.